Friday, October 19, 2012, at Sherwood Park, Alberta, CANADA
“Today I am grateful for the Moms who asked me to share again some secrets about kids learning to run their own brains, to engage active learning skills. I first published these secrets in a series of 7 articles back in 2010 and I am re-posting them here now.” – Doc Meek
“Today I am grateful for mothers and grandmothers!” – Doc Meek
Cheerful Grandmother with cheerful child
This is the seventh (7th) article in a series of seven (7) articles designed to help us run our own brain, and to help our children and students do the same, more easily and have more fun doing it. If you missed the Introduction or any of the previous six (6) articles, just click on the titles below:
Separate the Mother role from the Teacher role
When I worked with families in helping children to overcome learning difficulties, often there would be a battle going on at home which one mother described as “the homework wars.”
I would ask what was being taught. The mother would give me the school subjects being “taught.” I would then say:
Those subjects are not actually what is being taught. What is being taught is to hate learning and maybe even to hate your role in that. Is that what you want?
An emphatic “No” from the mother.
Then maybe we should take a larger perspective here.
School is not life.
Life is life.
And school–though important–is only part of life.
As Dr. Levine often says, “These kids are in general OK. We just need to get them safely into adulthood.”
When school was taking the child’s whole day–all of it unpleasant or painful–I felt that a better balance should come into play.
The child would go to school all day and then do homework all evening until bedtime. Not good.
No more homework until further notice!
I would ask the mothers to stop trying to be the school teacher, since the child had had enough of school teachers at school, without finding one at home every day until bedtime.
I asked the mothers to do what mothers generally do singularly well: just love them! Learn to have fun with them. So at least a part of the child’s day is pleasant and enjoyable and, in particular, human and humane.
Sometimes I would write an official letter to the school, requesting: “No more homework until further notice.”
Then the mother and the child could get on with life, while I and an external-to-the-home “brain coach” could help the child overcome his or her learning difficulties.
Grandmothers are great too
Sometimes the mothers were too busy to simply enjoy recreational time with the child and so we would bring grandma into play. If the child had no grandma near, we would borrow one from the neighborhood or even from a nearby “old folks home.”
The Grandmas loved it!
Here’s to Moms and Grandmas!
Doc Meek, Thurs, Oct 19, 2012, at Sherwood Park, Alberta, CANADA
“What if you are smarter than you think?”
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