“Passive Aggressive?” – Doc Meek

I’ve been MIA (“missing in action”) far too long!

Kelly and Sam have generously provided a great guest article for today about

subtle psychology and subtle behavior.

 

 

What Is

Passive

Aggressive

Behavior?

 

Open hostility is usually easy to spot. It’s the parent that belittles you,

the friend who insults you, or the significant other who constantly

criticizes your decisions.

But there’s another type of hostility that can creep into relationships:

Passive aggression. With passive aggression, the focus is still on

tearing you down though the other person is more subtle about it.

Here are a few examples of passive aggressive behavior that you

may encounter…

Backhanded Compliments

Amelia, a virtual assistant, attended a marketing conference several

years ago. While she was there, she met Victoria. Victoria got along

well with Amelia and her group of friends. Although Amelia never

got the feeling that Victoria didn’t like her, she did pick up on some

backhanded compliments.

Victoria would say things like, “I don’t know how you find the time

to run a successful business. I wish I was as relaxed about all the chaos

in your business.” On the surface, these statements may sound like

compliments. But probe a little deeper and you’ll hear what Victoria

was really saying. “I don’t understand why you’re successful. You’re

so disorganized in your life and business.”

Sullen Behavior

When Zoey was moving from her apartment to the home she would

be sharing with her new husband, she asked her sister, Natalie, to help

her move. Natalie showed up two hours late with no apologies or

explanations.

Then she spent the entire time complaining to Zoey. The boxes were

too heavy, the task was taking too long, and the day was too muggy.

Whenever Zoey tried to lighten the mood with a funny story or casual

joke, Natalie just rolled her eyes. While Natalie may have agreed to help

Zoey, it was clear from her behavior that she really didn’t want to.

Passive aggressive behavior is often the result of someone saying “Yes”

when they really meant “No”.

Quiet Sabotage

Haley and her friend Ruby decided to lose weight together. For the first

few weeks, both women saw results. But as time went on, Ruby had a

few setbacks while Haley continued to lose pounds and inches.

Ruby started saying things to her friend like, “I think you’re pushing

too hard. Just take it easy for a few weeks. One cheeseburger isn’t going

to set you back.” Sometimes, friends try to quietly sabotage each other.

This could be due to jealousy (they want what you have) or fear (they

don’t think they’ll achieve the same results) or insecurity (they worry

they’ll lose you).

Open hostility may be easier to take in some ways because you don’t

doubt the other person’s intentions. But keep in mind that passive

aggressive behavior carries the same message. The only difference is

a more subtle delivery.

CTA: Learn how to recognize passive aggressive behavior

when you download your free workbook from Kelly and Sam!

photo
Kelly & Sam
@ White Label Perks
kellyandsam@whitelabelperks.com
whitelabelperks.com

Thank you, Kelly and Sam, for the great work that you do!

Doc Meek, Sherwood Park, Alberta, CANADA, Oct 13, 2018

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